Thursday, December 13, 2012

Cooking -- Reindeer Games

It's the annual Mom Christmas Craft Olympics around Anaheim Hills. Sound the trumpets! Da da-da daaaaa!!!

I'm proud to report that I usually medal in these exercises. Not a gold. Oh no no no... 

Golds go to Room Moms who give a shit about more than just their kid. They plan games and crafts and treats for the masses. I would need to live in Colorado and have access to some quality ganja to handle that kind of pressure.

And Silvers go to Crafty Moms who scrapbook and come up with original ideas. They whip out their stamps and their hot glue guns and sew and shit. I'm afraid of needles. And glue.

I get the Bronze. I do lots of Pinterest research and rip-off the best idea. I throw lots of cash away at Michaels and then execute with mediocre skill and quality.

Yay me! 

So for my first event, baking, I made these darlings for my Girl Scout Troop. (How I was ever allowed to be a leader, I do not know.)

I think they look a little more like bears than reindeer but does that really matter? The girls only cared about who got to eat Rudolph first which I think it just sick since Rudolph seems to have the most human-like qualities of all of them. 

In my next event, classroom treats, I made assembled these bad boys. 

I asked Lincoln if he thought they looked like Reindeer Noses and he said they looked more like poo poo. 

I find this interesting for many reasons. 

First, what about the red one? Does Rudolph shit red? I think NOT!

Second, Lincoln usually says his poop looks like other things (worms, people, etc.)  So, NOW he says something looks like feces? Thanks a lot, Linc. 

Third, it totally looks like caca. 

But it's my caca. And I stand behind it. 

This is coming out all wrong. 

OMG, I cannot even stop it if I tried!!!

I give up.  

So I'm still deciding on a third event. But all the poop talk sugar is giving me a belly ache. (Sidenote: Is it normal to be simultaneously nauseated and craving nachos from Taco Bell?)

So, while I ponder my next great project, feel free to knock-off my knock-offs and do them even better. If you want, I can send you template of the tags I used for the Reindeer NOSES. 

 And may the crafty odds be ever in your favor!

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