Now we all know I love me some shopping. Online, in the mall, in the Trader Joes...whatever. I love buying me some stuff.
I wrote awhile back about my children's swimsuit obsession. Well, we're going on a Disney cruise this summer. So the fever has begun early. This one is already hiding in my garage along with its matching hat and coverup.
Isn't it perfect????
Perfectly normal behavior for an Orange County
But as the year begins anew, my mind starts thinking about the bigger spending picture. My dream home....
I don't even need to ask. But isn't it fucking perfect? (I would totally stop saying fuck if I lived there. You wouldn't need to. It would never even enter your mind!)
Unfortunately, we are victims of that fucking real-estate-bubble-bursting-shit. So we bought our modest townhome 7 years ago for the price of an I.E. McMansion now. But, eventually, I'd like to "move on up" as they say.
I don't need much. An extra bedroom or two or three. A yard, say.....one or two acres. That's it! Why you laugh?
But, in order to get said estate, Larry-the-buzzkill says we need to tighten the belts that I would use if my muffin top didn't already do the job just fine.
(Even as I type this post, I am getting sidetracked by an ad for Modcloth. I'm now perusing dresses that are adorable but I'll never wear in a million years. But, maybe, if I buy one a size smaller that will motivate me...NOO!!!! I cannot do that AGAIN! I have a closet full of cute-but-never-actually-worn-clothes-with-tags-that-mock-me-each-morning-before-I-choose-the-boring-striped-t-shirt-yet-again. I must break the cycle!)
How perfect is this for a fancy soiree that I shall host one day?
What was I saying? Ah yes. A house. So I ask Larry for how long we'd need to save. He replies, "Oh. Two or three years."
I didn't ask but I'm still hoping he meant months. And as long as I don't ask for clarification, I can live in my delusional happy place where we have a new Cape Cod manor by Easter. Yay!!! Perfect for entertaining!!
I don't know about years, though. I'm a carpe diem kinda gal. And once I'm moved by something, I gotta have it. Hence, my daughter is enrolled in fifty after school classes because they all sound so fun and TOTALLY necessary to her academic enrichment.
Hence, I'll probably buy these curtains because, even though I will need to get them altered to fit our doors, I simply want them. And they'd fit perfectly in Cape Cod so really I'm saving money by not buying curtains twice. Take that, Suze fucking Orman.
Aren't they perfect??? And they totally match the dress above!
But we really need a house with a yard ASAP. And it's Larry's fault. (I love how, in my last post, someone commented ANONYMOUSLY that I should stop blaming Larry for everything. I immediately told Larry that if he had something to say to me he should say it to my face and not comment anonymously on my blog post. He denied any involvement and I believed him because it's too hard to comment on an iPhone. So whoever you are...I will do my best not to blame him for things that are not his fault. When and if that day comes.)
But this is clearly his work.
Meet Max Bialystock. He's a rescued schnoodle (half schnauzer, half poodle) and the best friend that Larry has wished for all his life. I actually thought I fit that bill until Max came along. Guess Larry likes his best friends to be furrier. I tried.
I did not want a dog. I always told Larry that we'd get one after Lincoln was potty trained and we got a new house. I was hoping, at the very least, it would speed those events along. Still waiting. On both accounts.
Max is very well behaved and about as house broken as Lincoln. Which I guess is as much as you can ask from two boys.
But Max ain't cheap! He requires food and grooming and cute accessories. How am I going to save when I have something new to shop for?
Well, I guess I should be thankful that I've been blessed with another child. Even if all they do is eat up your dreams. I'm just buying those curtains now.
Should I? Are they too much???